By: Jessenia Archer (click the image to go there)

Confessions of a Hogwarts Student

Hello all you gossip seekers of Hogwarts! As you know, with the vast population here at Hogwarts, that not everything can go according to plan. Embarrassing mishaps, shocking confessions, the occasional catfight, whatnot. As such, we in the Slytherin house, have taken it upon ourselves to bring you the latest in Hogwarts Gossip. I would like to personally introduce the newest gossip column, the dreaded confessions!
So remember the next time you want to ‘borrow’ your roommate’s new shirt, or you walk in the wrong bathroom, our spies will be on the lookout! With that being said, let’s get to the juicy confessions!

‘With the absence of a certain Slytherin to Beauxbaton’s,
I have taken up sleeping with a stuffed bunny he has bequeathed to me.
I like to think that he never actually left.
But if anyone asks, I am just keeping an eye on it for him.”
-Mr. Clean

‘I hate the Ravenclaw girls because they are mean to me!’
-Ms. Ravie

‘There is this Slytherin girl who is so stuck up her own arse,
that I am amazed that she even functions.
Any time she sees me, she feels the need to say something s
mart about anything from my appearance, to the way I walk!
So one day I got so fed up with it that when she left her glass
of pumpkin juice unattended, I spit in it.
She never did notice, and I got a nice laugh!
Totally makes up for some of the horrible things she said.
-Gryffie Avenger

‘During the last quidditch season, I refused to change my underwear.
It started when I wore a certain pair, that won us a particularly hard match.
I became convinced that it was all because of the undies.
Therefore I wore them everyday, all day, and all night. I only took them off to shower!
Let’s just say that I wasn’t the most popular dude on the team that season.
But hey, we got close to winning the cup!
-Slytherin Quidditch Fanatic

Alright folks those are just a few of your fellow classmates’ dirty little secrets. Got something that you need to get off your chest? Send me a PM, and remember all confessions that are submitted will be done so anonymously, so there is nothing to fear! See you next time kiddies, with more juicy confessions!

XoXo,
Annabelle Leigh

Flibbertigibbet
by Ginger Wadsworth

Recently at a Pyro Puff’s birthday party, several interesting things happened. Not only did the Puff receive gifts from members of the Sly house that did not maim, she also received a gift from a very special person in the Gryff house. A gold dress and an invitation to the HO-liday ball. Le gasp..is it luv? This reporter will keep her opinion to herself. To round out the “lovely” event, a firstie Claw let off fireworks to a certain professor’s dismay. Joy.

Maybe it’s the holiday spirit, but there have been a lot of Sly/Gryff dating. It’s possible that the houses are merely promoting Christmas, but we’ll have to wait until after the new year to find out. With that in mind, our favorite Azkaban visitor and vampy seemed to have found love. That my dear readers is not a passing holiday fad, but awesomeness. Potter, you have graduated so the word is now up for grabs.

A certain Gryff boy, with several unusual nicknames aka Papa, received numerous Christmas gifts from the Slytherin house. Incidentally, how did a certain Sly boy get ahold of the Muggle blanket called a Snuggie? Nice touch with the itching powder though. As for other students? Their gifts ranged from yummy snacks, jewelry and the ever practical umbrellas. Except one. Another Gryff boy with a famous family name received soap. Apparently, he likes mud baths. Is this how he keeps that youthful glow at the ripe old age of fourteen?

Through the grapevine, I’ve recently learned that several of my cohorts had an interesting time at the kissing booth during the Chessival thingy. A certain red headed Gryff girl who will one day be a rock star…and let’s clarify…she wears thrift store clothes by choice..was caught kissing a certain 5th year Claw boy by a certain B.C. Now C.N. might be completely innocent in this matter, but will Bizzy ever be the same?

No first years were maimed in the writing of this article. Surprised? You should be.

If you have any gossip, please send an anonymous owl (pm) to Ginger ASAP.

By: Lorinda Swansong

• A mysterious group called the Rebels are looking for members. Something to do with the Dark Wizards, I think. To join post in the thread in the Plot Vault.
• Please welcome our newest Professors, and one Staff member, to Hogwarts!. Professors Cromwell, MaKenzie, Chambers, Mrotek, Harnett, Kimble, Morgan, MacDonald, Lovingsgood and Montgomery, and Madame Rehema Voss.
• If you don’t know already, enrollment for Winter Term is now open. Some classes have limited numbers, so get in quick!

• No absences to report.

The Sorting Hat worked it magic, and welcomed the following folks to Hogwarts -

•
Arieala Darcy into Gryffindor.
• Takumi Suou, Amaya Nox into Hufflepuff.
• Carlene Heidi Santivanez, Lucas Consly, Thomas Grindor into Ravenclaw.
• into Slytherin.

Please contact Lorinda Swansong to add a personal message.

Future Professors of Hogwarts: The member list is now open for new and continuing members, so sign up!
Scroll and Quill Club: Quote of the Week poll is now open so get voting. The theme was Winter, and the writers came up with some interesting quotes. Winning quote get scrolled along the clubs banner for the week.
Ideas for clubs - If you think there’s a club missing from the wide variety of clubs on offer, start a new one! Info can be found in the clubs forum.

If you have any announcements for the Pensieve, Owl ((i.e. PM)) me, Lorinda Swansong ASAP. Club notices by the Professor and Student Mods only. Birthday, absences and other announcements welcome. Special thanks to Lyra Elani for the headings.

Disapparating Groom

This time of year brings not only joy, happiness and presents. Reports of crimes throughout both Wizarding and Muggle Worlds have escalated to an all time high. One such crime occured in the quaint town of Rose Wood, when an entire neighborhood was stupefied by Rita Skeeter. The former journalist stated she was simply trying to find her ‘groom to be’ who had disapparated earlier that evening.

Ministry officials were alerted, and arrived within minutes to take Ms. Skeeter into custody. Through our short interview, before she was escorted to Azkaban, we were able to find out one small part of the story. “I was looking for my Xeno. We’re getting married you see.” She states somewhat confidently as she continues to scan the area for ‘Xeno’. When Ms. Skeeter is taken away, Mr. Xenophilius Lovegood came forward to speak with the Ministry Officials to file a report.

“That crazy bug woman said I was marrying her, even if I didn’t want to! She needs to be in St. Mungo’s I tell you!” Mr. Lovegood ranted continuously as he shivered with anger. “Why do you think she was so determined to marry you?” As I asked this, Xeno laughed maniacally as he answered. “She was hoping she would gain the Quibbler when I passed on, but everything I have will be going to my daughter Luna.”

With this question answered, we now know the very strange reasoning behind Ms. Skeeter’s actions. However, she does seem to need a nice long vacation, compliments of St. Mungo’s.

Magical Jeopardy

Hello Everybody! We’re still waiting on MAGICAL JEOPARDY for the Pensieve Puzzles! After spending about a week making this interactive Jeopardy board, we just need more contestants! Now, contestants will only see an image of the board, to prevent cheating, but they will be playing LIVE! Not only to they get to have fun, but they get House Points as well! For every 100 points they earn in the game, they will receive 10 House Points! In other words, they will receive 10% of the points they earn in the game as House Points.
However, only ONE contestant will be allowed from each house, so submit applications to play! Once at least one member from each house has signed up, I will announce the four Finalists and the time that they are to be on Chatzy to play! Currently, the signed up contestants are…
Gryffindor: Lizzadora Chantilly
Hufflepuff: None
Ravenclaw: None
Slytherin: Taylor Spence
Remember that regardless of who has signed up for you house you can still sign up! That way I can choose the four who are able to be on at the same time.
Good Luck!

To Sign Up:
To Sign up for Magical Jeopardy, please PM the following code to Nicholas Shwimmer.
Name:
House:
Year:
ID#:
Available Dates & Times:
Portkey

By: Seymore Whydontcha

This morning, I was awakened by the sounds of a baby crying somewhere close by. More than a little surprised by this, considering I live alone. Curious of the very odd sound in my home, I walked in the direction the sound was coming. I walked into my parlor and toward my crystal ball. The sound was coming from the scene inside. As I stepped closer, the fog cleared and showed me a beautiful blonde woman holding a newborn baby. The woman’s face was very familiar, one I’d seen many a time at Hogwarts, mainly in the Gryffindor Common Room. Happiness radiated from her as she looked upon the child in her arms, then up at the man she loves.

******

The fog fills the crystal ball, closing out the scene, then opens up upon another. Once again, the scene involves a Gryffindor. This time, a student from a well known family. Sadly, the girl has been possessed by a Wood Staining creature. I see family members, and friends struggle as they search for a cure. They are finally assured by a healer, that the effects are not long lasting.

The scene changes slightly, and opens showing a small group of students. Several students ask if the Dark Wizards are somehow to blame for this affliction. Before the healer can answer, fog fills the crystal ball, closing out the scene before me.

******

When the fog clears, I see one of the many dark wizards inside Hogwarts. The man, tall and evil looking, is among a rather large group of students inside a dark room. The room resembles the ones in the dungeons, and is being used to hold students hostage. The Dark Wizard is too busy reprimanding a couple of students to hear the sounds from the other side of the door. When he leaves the room, to continue with his reign of torture, kidnapping and brainwashing, he finds himself knee deep in a swamp!

Fog filled the ball again, without showing anything more of the inhabitants of Hogwarts. Until next time, I remind you: Gryffindor House females, Professors may want to see a healer in the event they are with child. Students may want to be on the lookout (and avoid) any strange looking creatures. This last bit of advice is for all Hogwarts inhabitants, for a good laugh, one dark wizard will fall into some sort of mud puddle/swamp like hole.